The Best Foods

This will be a rant. I will probably write something beautiful about spring coming next week, but right now I"m just in a mood. Husband's been working a lot, and I'm sort of tired out. Which is why I'm thinking about food so much.
Tonight I made this super healthy supper, which feels good. If you know me you know how much I hate cooking, and out of all of the things I'm "supposed" to do right now with my "job" as "homemaker" (Sorry for the excessive quotes, but they are all necessary), cooking is the worst. Definitely below cleaning toilets. Tonight we had stew beef, steamed carrots and red potatoes, and homemade cornbread with homemade gravy. The beef was grass-fed organic, the carrots were organic too. And it just felt good. But here's the thing that I'm getting SO TIRED OF lately. (And I should insert here, it's not because of things any of my friends or peers say or do). I'm kind of tired of feeling guilty about what I feed my kids. I do the best I can, and sometimes the best is really not... "good". Sometimes it involves crackers, or macaroni, or fish sticks from a box. But they aren't hungry, and they're growing and they aren't obese, and we have a pretty fun time together most days. So why do I feel guilty when I make them mac and cheese sometimes? Why does it bother me when I heat up some frozen veggies in the microwave? Why should I be wondering about the source of the eggs we eat?
I'm kind of fed up with the way our country makes food. How we actually EAT industry and commercialism every day. I'm kind of tired of hearing about it, too, though. I mean, if you really take all of the news to heart about genetically modified things, whole foods, intollerances, sprays, etc, there's really nothing left to eat. Uness I'm growing my own garden in some hyperbolic chamber that can't be cross-contaminated, with heirloom seeds that I spent $4 a piece on, with compost that I made out of last year's organic crop, in soil that I dug out from WHO KNOWS WHERE... I mean, how does this work? There's really no good way to stop the machine.
I try. I get organic veggies for the ones we eat a lot of. I've been feeding the kids grass-fed beef (thanks to my parents' christmas present to us). We play outside all the time. We don't use cans of cream-o-whatever soups. We bake our own bread. We don't eat out much, and I don't fry foods much. But it just doesn't seem good enough in this pinterest-loving society I live in. It just doesn't cut it.
When did eating veggies and taking a Flinstone become completely passe? Why is it all so complicated? Why can't they just have a PB and J and go out and play?
Don't get me wrong. I would love to feed them (and me) from the all-natural aisles, and give them those healthy super foods like kale and acai and whatever. But I don't have that much extra money sitting around. And I don't like cooking enough. And I don't want to make myself like it and take that much time to make it, and feel drained every day by the time my husband gets home because I was busy cooking some delicious all-natural meal. Because if I did, I would just resent it. I wouldn't be doing it in love. I would be doing it out of guilt and obligation and I would be miserable. And let's face it. Sometimes dealing with the whines and complaining and just getting kids to put their shoes on to get to school on time is about all we moms can handle before we're ready to pull our hair out.
This isn't a statement against people who do the all-natural thing. Some of my best friends are into that. And they do it really well. Really, I'm "into" it too, as in I've heard all the research and I know what's "best". But folks, as with all good things, there is a give and take at play here.  I could make those really healthy meals, but I would be giving up energy and time that I put into the kids. I could pay double at the grocery store, but I would be giving up money we spend on extras and fun things like vacation. So, like with most things that we decide in our families, I've weighed my options and I've gone with what I think is best for us. Sure, I want to do better. But right now, in this preschool-crying baby, messes-all-over-the-house phase of life, "BEST" is taking a few extra minutes to play outside or read a book to the kids, and a little less time standing at the stove. Best is having a little bit of a smile left when Husbandy comes home. Best involves love, and giving sacrificially. Best is keeping myself sane by slowing down to play Scrabble on my Kindle for ten minutes. Best is choosing to place my kids' health and lifespan into God's hands after I've done what I can to follow the health rules, and trusting that He'll keep them here on earth as long as He wants, and knowing that, like Job said, "no plan of His can be thwarted". Despite what I do to ruin them.