Brokenness

I wrote this after reflecting on my baby brother who died at 6 days old. His birthday was Monday and he would have been 26. Obviously it ended up being more of my personal thoughts. The phrases "you are yourself the answer" and "what other answer would suffice" were taken from C.S. Lewis' Till We have Faces, which has been and will forever be the best book I ever read.

Brokenness

Years go by but once in a while I still find myself asking why
Why, in the midst of so much sorrow, must you allow for more
why, when the joy so simple and pure is lost, does it ruin so many other things
why do you take these little ones home
Why do babies have to die?
and grace rolls down and mercy shows
as your hand guides us and your presence
guides our steps, causing the peace to flow
but even in your goodness, the doubt staggers in
touching and picking and pulling
making me face the questions I wish would die
and causing me to wonder why.
Why would you let it be this way
when the sorrow is almost too much to take
and the pain can never be erased
why do you take these little ones home
why do babies have to go?
and all the answers are trite when told to a burning, broken heart
All but one—you yourself are the Answer
in your love we find hope
in your light we find comfort
in your brokenness
we are healed
In your arms we find peace
and that will be enough for me
for what other answer would suffice?