New Years Eve

when I was in high school, I started a tradition of writing in my journal every New Year's. I'd go through each month and mention something significant that happened.
This year, there was hardly anything significant. The year seems to have blurred into my husband being busy with work and having deployment dates pushed back three times, and endless days with the kids taking me on a roller coaster of every feeling they feel. Looking back its hard to even find any positive monuments in 2010. There were plenty of happy times and joyous moments, but the milestones this year were a different kind.
I joined an in depth Bible study in Feburary, studying the book of John. It was amazing to see things in a different light, things I'd studied and even memorized years earlier. I learned new things about the Holy Spirit and His role in my life, and about the way God views us as His sheep.
In March I enjoyed two getaways, one to the Women of Faith conference in Des Moines, and the other to Tennessee to visit my sister at college.
In the spring I tried my second attempt at gardening, yielding a very small harvest but learned a lot along the way.
The summer was another re-write of four weddings and a funeral (round 2, if you remember back a few years). This time it was family getting married. we enjoyed three beautiful weddings. Both of my husband's cousins who live in town hitched up this year, along with brother #4.
The funeral, of course was Grandma's. I still think about her. Just yesterday I found a picture at my mom's house of her in her crazy folding hat that she wore the last time she went to the parade with us. She was beautiful, and I hope that my life has half of the impact hers did on the world.
My brother deployed, which has made for many times with the empty chair at the family's table staring at us all. I miss him, and worry about him and find myself terribly concerned for his mental and physical welbeing.
Late in the fall, we made a big step on our house project by closing the building permit on the attic remodel. It's been an eternal project, and it still isn't finished. But there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
I'm eager to begin 2011. I think the political state of the country is going to continue to be a big issue, and I'm fully expecting everything to get worse than it already is. But, in our little world, there are many joys and wonders to still to experience.
Earlier today Daniel played an old Twila Paris song on the guitar, "God is in control". I felt the truth deep in my heart.

This is no time for fear
This is a time for faith and determination
Don't lose the vision here
Carried away by emotion
Hold on to all that you hide in your heart
There is one thing that has always been true
It holds the world together

God is in control
We believe that His children will not be forsaken
God is in control
We will choose to remember and never be shaken
There is no power above or beside Him, we know
God is in control, oh God is in control

History marches on
There is a bottom line drawn across the ages
Culture can make its plan
Oh, but the line never changes
No matter how the deception may fly
There is one thing that has always been true
It will be true forever

He has never let you down
Why start to worry now?
He is still the Lord of all we see
And He is still the loving Father
Watching over you and me

watching over you...watching over me..
watching over every things..
watching over you..watching over me..
every little sparrow..every little things...

Happy New year everyone! I love you all, whether I know you or not. Thanks for reading!

Christmastime

We've been busy the last few weeks. I'm kind of ready for things to settle down, but given hubby's work schedule, that's not going to happen for a while. But, here's what we've been up to (not in chronological order):


JJ's first Christmas opening presents. She wasn't too excited about it. I'd give her a gift and she'd say "noo." Then I'd open it and she'd grab the toy from me and forget what we were doing.

Black velvet jumpers $2.99 each. Red shirts=hand me downs Matching girls smiling for a picture=priceless. (This was before teh Christmas Eve service).
We made a gingerbread house together a few weeks before Christmas. You can't see a lot of details in this, but that's probably really good. We went with the Aldi's brand this year.
#1 Made a manger scene with her stuffed animals. There's a tiny baby Jesus in the middle. The doll is Mary and the cocker spaniel is Joseph I guess.
Christmas program at church. This was the last year dressing up as little angels. She LOVED it and actually sang this year. "Ring those bells, ring those bells..." That's her BFF to the front right, and two friends' boys on the left. And a pastor's kid on her direct right. It was awesome. I LOVE watching kids sing even if mine isn't up there.

You might notice #2 isn't really in most of these. That's because she's hard to take pictures of. And she mostly just whine and throws fits when we're trying to do activities, rather than participate. Since she's not even 2 yet.

There would be more but I haven't pilfered my sister's camera yet, so I guess that's all for now. Merry Christmas everyone!

What the Heck

Just feel like saying this. Why is it, after like FIVE years of having something posted up on this blog, I am just NOW getting hits and comments about it??

Baby Born to Die

It's been busy around here lately. I'm hoping things slow down soon. I think they should this week. Christmas plans are coming together. My sister gets home tomorrow from Tennessee, and my older brother might actually be able to come home too. He still doesn't know. My family might still go to Montana, though, depending on what the brother does.
I have my packages and cards sent, and just a couple more presents to purchase. This year my in-laws decided to spend time together instead of getting gifts, so we're traveling up to a resort in Wisconsin for a couple of days after Christmas. The kids will play in water parks and we'll hang out together. It should be fun.
Every year there's some song that really captures what I've thought about, and that I don't get sick of hearing after two times. This year I've listened to Bebo Norman's Christmas album a lot. I love his voice and the quiet folk sound, and I love that he uses hammered dulcimer and mandolins, and changes songs into nifty little tunes. There are two songs I like best out of his originals. This one kind of captures it for me. What Christmas means somewhere in my heart, beyond warm feelings and family time and little candies and cookies and wrapping papers and awesome movies. I have to dig it out of there and really think on it, but this helps me do it.

They never knew a dark night
always had the Son's light
on their face
Perfect in glory
Broken by the story
of untold grace...
come that day

Majesty had come down 
Glory had succumbed now 
to flesh and bone
In the arms of a manger
In the hands of strangers
that could not know
Just who they hold

Chorus:
And the angels filled the sky 
All of heaven wondered why
Why their King would choose to be 
Be a baby born to die

And all fell silent 
For the cry of an infant,
the voice of God
Was dividing history
For those with eyes to see,
the Son would shine
From earth that night

Chorus 

Bridge:
To break the chains
Of guilt and sin
To find us here 
To pull us in 
So we can join in Heaven's song
And with one voice around the throne

Chorus:
All the Angels filled the sky
And I can't help but wonder why 
Why this King would choose to be
Be a baby born for me
Be a baby born 
Be a baby born to die

A Winter Tale

I was probably seven years old. We lived in a farm house that my folks rented. While we used the home and the yard, the farm around us operated by Ed Hynek and his family. We were used to having livestock on the property. Dad used the old chicken coop to raise his own goats, and we had a dog. Otherwise, the rest of the livestock was owned and taken care of by the landlord.
On a night after another storm had ripped through, dropping a foot of snow and temperatures down to the zeros, we all stayed in the warm little house together watching movies.
Then the landlord called. He'd asked my dad if he could take care of the animals, since he was snowed in behind drifts.
Mom had kept us inside all through the storm and the next day, saying it was too cold to go out. But now, Dad had said we could go help feed the cows with him. We bundled up in everything we had--extra pants, socks and shirts. Then snow boots, snow pants, thickest coats, mittens and hats. A hood on top of that. And a scarf to tie it all down.
A lot of the details have faded in my memory, but I'll always remember how still and quiet it was. And the stars were out in the black sky, and there was nothing to see or hear in that stillness but snow. It crunched under our feet while we tromped to the barn.
And then the welcoming scent of animals, and the windbreak of the giant white barn. There were two or three barns on the property but we weren't ever allowed to go inside of them. This was the cow barn. Today we climbed up the ladder to the hay loft, and Dad hoisted a couple of hay bails down to the cows below.
I don't know why I remember it so much. Just how cool it was that we were even outside, with negative thirty temps was amazing enough. And then I got to see my dad be something he normally wasn't. It's cool when someone has these hidden talents and smarts that most of the world doesn't get to know about. Mom told me that Ed liked having us live at the house because Dad knew how to handle animals.
Something about these winter storms and the still cold nights that follow always remind me of that first one I remember, bundled up from head to toe, face against the wind, headed to the white barn with my dad and brother. It makes me warm inside, even while I shiver.